Just found out recently that a relative of mine had joined an MLM company allegedly to be around for more than 100 years. We (my missus and I) had been introduced to this product some time in the past by an old friend of hers.
I tell you the encounter was unpleasant not because of the products but because of the friend’s support group. Do you realize that these “people” cannot accept ‘No’ for an answer?
When you hesitate or begin to disagree with them, they’ll gang-up on you and pretty darn near verbally beat you to death for saying ‘No’. They’ll use fear on you. Fear of losing out, fear of being labeled a “loser”, of having a closed mind. ‘Kia-su’ would be an apt description of how they’ll try to make you feel.
I’ve such an encounter before…but not at the receiving end though…at the giving end. When I left my IT job in the early 2000s, I joined a “Direct Marketing” company in PJ.
Now these people would go to great lengths to point out the minute differences between Direct Selling (DS) and Direct Marketing (DM). Sounds the same to me coz the techniques are the same. Make a list; DS wants a list of your friends, relatives and close contacts while DM makes a list of prospective strangers or locations where the chances of closing a sale is highest, next highest and so on.
Then you make the cold calls, sales pitch n if that fails to make a sale, you use fear. The fear of losing out to the Jones. You know? Like what you see on the telly and papers and hear on the radio. It’s in their training.
One thing that’s really different about DM is that in order to meet your target, make sure nothing and I mean NOTHING stands in your way; be it a lowly security guard or a high security area. If the building rules require you register with the front desk, they’ll try to find an alternate way of entering…through the car park entrance, pretend to use the toilet, whatever. Made me really uncomfortable.
I was not brought up to bend or break rules like that. I firmly believe that there are only two ways of doing something, the right way and the wrong way. My conscience just wouldn’t let me forget it. I just had to leave even though I’d made pretty good figures everyday in the two weeks I was in.
Now back to my young relative…
Reading his email reply to my comments posted on the family’s unofficial email forum, I get the impression that I’d somehow insulted his decision to join and had placed him on the defensive.
His explanation was not something I’d expect from a Direct Selling person. He quoted that company’s long history and how the product has aesthetic value that appreciates over time, etc. Most telling was that money was not a factor in his decision. The ‘Doubting Thomas’ in me said “yeah, right! And Uncle Lim and brood up the hill are willing to donate 50% of their daily income to Pure Life Society and the Montfort Boys Home!”.
It was really easy for me to dismiss his decision. But I reminded myself that my experience is uniquely mine and his will never ever be the same. He has every right to believe in whatever he wants and I have no right to say otherwise. Reading the reply a second time still didn’t lower the protests from “Thomas” but I gave him my support in his decision… I hope it come across as that in the email. Not being able to read the subtle nuances of human communications along with the body language makes it very hard to read between the lines and feel the sincerity (or the lack thereof) of the speaker.
Anyway, what I have noticed in my many encounters with MLM-ers is that if they firmly believe in the products and company, they can go very far and build very strong businesses. I mentioned in my reply to his reply that sometimes the mind tends to rationalize the decision that was made out of fear when the heart said ‘No’ but fear of losing said ‘Yes’.
In the course of my ‘research’ on self-improvement and self-healing, I had found much has been said of the human body expresses any conflicts from a mismatch between the body/mind and soul/heart as pain, stress or even disease (minor or major) such as cold sores, sore throats, migraines, coughs and colds, etc. Some alternative healing methods are even able to identify the 'causes' of these physical sufferings.
Authors such as Deepak Chopra and Mark Victor Hansen get lots of sales of their books because of this mismatch. Countless websites have sprung up in attempts to address or resolve it. One such website is run by Gary Craig who calls his form of healing as EFT (www.emotfree.com). Lots of testimonials. I’ve had limited success using it. I get the feeling that I’ll get better results if I’d purchased the full VCD/DVD/Video training series.
I have a friend who used to be in the corporate world but now she’s a Healer in Reiki (www.reiki.org), crystals, Shiatsu and maybe a few more including Regression Therapy. All of these sounds like mumbo-jumbo but her personal experience on successful treatments say otherwise. The human mind is so complex that after all these years of success and countless theories by noted psychologists (ole’ Sigmund F among them) still haven’t been able to make any progress in expanding our understanding and our treatment of mind-related illnesses. ADHD, ADD, etc. have been linked to chemical imbalance of the brain.
But do you realize that when the mind and heart agrees on a decision, it is life changing? Look at Gandhi, Mother Teresa and Nelson Mandela. These great people not only changed their own lives but also have affected the rest of the world! Nearer home, have you ever noticed how a child behaves when he/she has decided on something?
My eldest, Jon, is so keen on getting his own Gameboy that all we have to do now is to threaten to remove this treat to get him to behave. Good thing too as I’m getting worried about him getting immune to threats of physical punishments. I made him a promise; behave himself for 6 months (I track him on a calendar, a cross if he’s been naughty n a checkmark if he’s been behaving) and I’ll get him a Gameboy by end of December.
At one point, he wanted so much to play on a Gameboy, he was willing to eat his most dreaded enemy, veggies! Just one little bite was enough to make him puke. He was willing to eat one whole spoonful in order to be able to go to my friend’s house and play with his daughter’s Gameboy.
To date (14 May 07), he still haven’t “earned” the Gameboy or Playstation yet. His revulsion for veges seems stronger than his need for video games.
Well, I’m focusing on helping him control his distracted mind, making use of the opportunity to control mine as well. Am using simple meditation as the tool. Also getting him involved in a
In the meantime, Life goes on….
Kevin – KL,
No comments:
Post a Comment